This month at Flowing Flamingo we’ve been talking about self confidence. So with this in mind, I wanted to share with you all a little bit more about my own personal story with self confidence and how focussing on my superpowers really helped me overcome some hefty lows.
I’ve always been a naturally quite confident person- known as a bit ‘gobby’ as a child with lots of sass and personality haha! (that’s what my mum would call it anyway), so when I lost my self-confidence I really didn’t know what to do with myself.
It had been a slow decline when it came to losing my self-confidence and when I reflect I can see that it really started in the 2020 lockdown era.
Lockdown threw us all through a loop right! I went from a routine in my life that I had been used to since graduating Uni, to working at home, not being able to get out the house for exercise and all the other stressors that came with being in a small space ALL. THE . Time.
I started to put weight on and I just looked swollen. Looking back now it was clearly the cortisol in my body, all that stress just wasn’t good for me at all!
I also struggled with working from home. I love being around people and collaborating is part of my personality so to lose that so suddenly and have to adapt to presenting over Zoom in meetings, hosting creative brainstorms online and managing difficult relationship conversations via Teams was adding so much stress I just felt like I wasn’t doing anything well or right.
I was leading a new brand at work too so had the added pressure of trying to build new relationships in role, stepping up a level and working towards a promotion. Quite honestly, I burnt myself out, but didn’t realise at the time.
I felt totally lost, stuck and like I didn’t even really know who I was anymore. After so many years of feeling confident and secure in myself this was a totally new feeling and led to, well sadness.
In 2021 I decided to go and see a therapist (virtually of course) and she was amazing. Over the course of the next few years, I spent time with two different therapists and discussed so many different things, but the main subject was about building my confidence back and reconnecting once more with who ‘Tash’ is.
Honestly it was amazing. Therapy introduced me to all the tools that I now use in my daily life and share with all of you guys too. From journalling to mindfulness and everything in between.
I learnt to understand myself, love myself again, believe in myself and actually because of this I was able to realign with my personal values and make some of the life changing decisions I made over the last few years – like leave corporate and set up Flowing Flamingo.
Exercise and movement were also a massive part of my self-confidence recovery. I’d always been a fit and petite person who enjoyed movement (growing up doing ballet, dance & yoga), but lost my love of exercise when I got deep into the corporate machine. Getting back on the wagon during Covid was actually one of the benefits of lockdown- giving me an excuse to find something I truly love and move my body again.
Getting my health back on track helped me to feel worth it and I loved the idea that I was truly nourishing myself. I found that if I looked after my body I’m looking after my mind, because I’m doing something ‘good’ ; you know?
Unlocking my Superpowers
Over the course of the years I worked with therapists and mentors who helped me discover my superpowers. This was a term we used together as it really helped me identify those things that make me unique and special. This changed my whole perspective.
I started to focus on cultivating those Superpowers, rather than focussing on the things that I considered ‘development areas’. Focussing on the positive parts of my character and personality, those things that I find easy and come naturally to me. Those things that bring value to my life and those around me, gave me a sense of purpose and worth.
I wrote down a list of these superpowers and asked my mum, best friend and mentor at work to do the same. Most of the words aligned which was excellent because it meant my external perception of myself was pretty accurate. Another confidence boost.
This image is from 2021 and is what I created off the back of that exercise. I’m sharing this to hopefully inspire you guys to do the same. I’m happy to be vulnerable if it can help others to recognise that they are not alone, we are all impacted by this stuff at different levels and at different times and that by sharing my superpowers, I’m hoping you can connect with yours too.
If you feel like sharing I’d love to celebrate those powers with you, so please feel free to DM me.
Love, Tash xx